Square Enix Pulls Over-the-Top Hitman Promo App From Facebook

Square Enix has killed Hitman: Absolution promo app, Hire Hitman, after users criticized  well, the whole damn thing. It was that bad of a move.

The short-lived Facebook application encouraged users to put out “hits” on their friends (strike one!), and provided a list of reasons to choose from that explained why you want Agent 47 to 86 your friend (strike two!). Do they fart too much? Are they the laziest person in the world? Do they never buy a round of drinks? Eff that, says Square Enix. Eff it.

And then, of course, our assassin has to be able to ID his target. Square has that covered. Users could have pinpointed the target’s small tits, eye bags, ginger hair, muffin top, huge gut, and bad tats, among others.

Strike three!

Finally, upon the target’s elimination, there was a lovely montage using uploaded Facebook photos to simulate life flashing before their eyes. Weird.

Strike four! You’re outta…wait. Too many strikes? Damn.

Square Enix pulled the app after only three hours.

Here’s their apology:

We were wide of the mark with the app, and following feedback from the community we decided the best thing to do was remove it completely and quickly. This we’ve now done. We’re sorry for any offense caused by this.

Kudos to Square for pulling the app, but why, oh, why would they think it was an acceptable idea in the first place?